Sometimes an unexpected journey is the most rewarding.
Today I drove my mom to Kuang, Selangor to attend burial of my grandaunt, Nek Ucu, my late grandfather’s youngest sister. I heard the news of her passing yesterday evening. The relatives couldn’t bury her yesterday evening itself as it rained heavily. Unfortunately or, fortunately, because it allowed me and my mom to pay our last respects to her.
We left for Kuang as soon as the morning traffic on Jalan Hulu Kelang eased, and made a quick breakfast stopover at Kaya Kopitiam, Sg Buloh Overhead Bridge R & R.
When we arrived at Nek Ucu’s house, they were preparing her “jenazah” or body to be transported to the cemetery. After the burial, the elderly relatives congregated at the same house and caught up with each other. Most of them get to see each other only at family events like funerals, weddings, kenduri-kendara and Hari Raya.
I sat with my cousins as we are not supposed to join in the conversation unless we are asked to, although we can hear everything the elders talked about.
One of my aunties, who are known as the grand diva in the family, befitting her Datin title, remarked about Nek Ucu not leaving any descendents, as she was not married and has no children, not even adopted ones.
What she said had left a small hole in my heart now, as I’m at risk of ending up like my late grandaunt. No children. Not worried about not having anyone to leave whatever I have, because that I am sure I do. But somehow having no children of my own does leave a gaping hole in my heart, more so than not being married.
If one were to measure the degree of success in life by who they have in life, namely, spouse and children, then I have not tasted success.
I don’t see signs that I’m getting married anytime so soon, and my biological clock is ticking, slowly but surely. That started me thinking of adopting a child or two.
I don’t know if I’m ever emotionally ready to become a parent, and a single parent nonetheless. But then again, sometimes an unexpected journey is the most rewarding.
If any of you out there who’s reading this blog, have personal experience being a single parent of adopted children, please share with me your experience – whatever it is. I really appreciate that.