Dream for an insomniac

  • For a 36 year-old who is neither a celebrity nor a beauty queen nor a multi-millionaire heiress, having quite an active fan club of admirers is not too bad, really. 

  • But sometimes I do wish my options are better-suited to what I’m looking for – whatever that is.

  • Don’t get me wrong, not that I’m not grateful or flattered that I actually do have a decent number of potential suitors out there. 

  • It is just that, all I’m looking for is my Other Half. I need only one man. THE ONE for me. I haven’t found him…

  • In the movie, “Dream for an Insomniac”, a conversation between Frankie and David goes like this: “There are so many mediocre things in life.  Love shouldn’t be one of them.” 

  • You see, I’ve come to a point in my life where I’m ready to treat love as a priority in my life.  Come to think of it, I don’t think that I have ever fallen in love. At least, not since I became single again.

  • I’m not sure if I’m able to fall in love again, actually. Since my divorce in 2003, crushes, many times. Almost love, a few times. But actually being in love, like being hit by a train, never. So, I don’t really know how that feels. Not anymore.

  • Anyway, back to the movie. in another scene, when David wanted to leave his live-in girlfriend Molly for Frankie, he said something like this to the no-nonsense goody two shoes Molly: “I think anything less than passionate love is a complete waste of time.”

  • Molly, of course thinks that is so absurd, as she thinks that to spend too much time on love is a waste of time.  I don’t want to be Molly. Yet, I know i’m sometimes I’m like her.


  • Like David, I too am looking for that “Wow! Factor”. Only that I’ve never really felt it. 

  • Oh God, I feel so numb and emotionally dysfunctional when it comes to romances and falling in love part. My love is like that treasure buried underneath a pharaoh’s pyramid.

  • I know, love is something that is so simple, yet so abstruse for my complicated and twisted mind to comprehend.

  • Perhaps, I’m just lousy at playing this game called love. Or I’m just plain tired.


About Nel Fahro-Rozi

I’m an avid reader, prolific wordsmith, cat lover, and passionate foodie and traveler. When I’m not in a world of my own with any of the above, I am an entrepreneur, communicator and writer. View all posts by Nel Fahro-Rozi

3 responses to “Dream for an insomniac

  • gigibiru

    nah dont look for it n let it look for u
    i suggest perhap like butterfly it will come

  • I cannot publish my name but Nell knows me


    Wow.. ‘anything less than passionate love is a complete waste of time’ .. damn.. I guess I have been wasting too much time here..

    whatever it is Nel, dont give up on love.. u dont have to actively looking for it all the time.. coz that would be too tiring.. tengok but dont be obsessed with it..

    i know one day it will find its way to you..

  • penglipurlara

    Tooth, okay ler tu, tapi butterfly tu hingap kejap jer ler. Dah tu hidup cuma 7 hari jer beb.

    Anonymous Friend, no regrets. Forgive the past. Just live in the present. Enjoy the moment while it lasts.

    Not that actively looking for love, just worried that I’m not feeling it. Numb jer ni.

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